Help Cyndi Translate This Article Please…

Posted on March 2, 2008. Filed under: Butdoisay TRUE STORIES |

My dear readers, I got this request from one of my readers Cyndi, from London, can someone out there translate it for Cyndi, she got it from a person called Stephen, I can understand it when reading, but I dont have time at the moment to translate it, please help me out if you have time. I guess Stephen is trying to introduce a new language almost similar to English…thanks in advance.

Clay Onyango

Hi Clay,
Came across this post. Would you kindly translate it for me? Not word for word but the general message. It was posted by someone by the name stanley.

As always, thanks.
Cindy

Furst ooff ell I vuooldleeke-a tu soobmeet my cumment by soorppurteeng Mr. Hurty flurty schnipp schnipp!Ireeck oon thet,he-a is med oon vhet tvu leeders hefe-a seegned zee egreement ooff shereeng pooer, it’s ebsulootelly trooe-a me-a tuu em nut heppy et ell fur reesuns thet, Peuple-a ooff Kenya used zeeur freedum ooff ilecteeng preseedent by demucrecy, veethuoot unybudy pueenting oor furceeng zeem tu vhum zeey shuoold oor moost ilect. Um de hur de hur de hur.Und thees is zeeur reeghts. Um gesh dee bork, bork!Zeey veked up ierly in zee murneeng zeey ilected zee oone-a zeey vunted. Bork bork bork!Zee resoolts shoon cleerly thet hunureble-a OoDINGA REILA vun zee ilecshun.Boot becoose-a ooff zee ifeel peuple-a vhu pretend zeemselfes thet zeey ere-a soopereeur thun zee oozeers, zeey stulee zee ilecshun,It is knoon ell oofer zee Vurld frum IOo, EOo,UN,U.S A,IA, ell ooff zeese-a hefe-a mede-a infesteegeshun by gueeng thruoogh zee inture-a ilecshun, zeey oobserfed thet zee ilecshun ves stulee, zeere-a ere-a muny seegns und fects thet sooppurteeng thet zee ilecshun ves stulee, ifee thuse-a vestern neshuns vhee zeey vere-a tryeeng tu keep peece-a, yuoo hefe-a heerd Keebeki und hees teem vere-a seyeeng ” ve-a hefe-a nu prublems in oooor cuoontry” oor, ve-a hefe-a celled nu budy ooff thees peuple-a tu cume-a tu us here-a, oooor prublems ere-a veethin ve-a kenyuns, ve-a du nut need unybudy tu help us ve-a veell sulfe-a oooor selfes” Su vhu is vrung in thet stetement,vhu is tryeeng tu dumeenunt nu metter hoo, et thet teeme-a zeey sey hed nu prublems it is thet teeme-a vhee peuple-a vere-a boorneeng iech oozeer fur stulee ilecshun,su vhu dues nut cere-a veezeer peuple-a ere-a dyeeng oor nut is it keebeki oor Reeela? deffeenetly Keebeki.Zee keellings vheech hefe-a hepened in kenya it is KIBEKI und hees TEEM vhu ere-a respunseeble-a fur thet. Um de hur de hur de hur.Becoose-a iff it ves nut zee ilecshun tu be-a stulee zeere-a vuoold nu uny ooff thuse-a keellings. Um gesh dee bork, bork!Luuk, et begeenning vhee zeey vere-a unuoonceeng thet REILA is veening mure-a thet meeliun futes eheed tu keebeki, it ves cuul,thet meuns peuple-a ooff kenya zeey felt ookey iff REILA veens, boot tu keebeki’s teem fur zeem ves nut ookey iff REILA veens, thet’s vhy vhee zeey fuoond Reeela vun, zeey deceeded tu steel zee ilecshun und roosheeng tu sveer heem su qooeeckly,thet’s vhee zee keelling sterted. Bork bork bork! Su cumeeng beck tu Mr. Hurty flurty schnipp schnipp! Stephee VENYEMA,I vunt tu tell yuoo thet zee cooser ooff ell thees tregeec in kenya keellings ves bruooght by KIBEKI und hees TEEM KIKOoYOo.Keekooyoo teem zeey du nut vunt uny ooff zee treebe-a tu be-a a preseedent,ixcept fur zee pest oone-a MOI, zeey du nut vunt uny mure-a deefffferent thun keekooyoo, It hes beee su seence-a zee fuoonder ooff zee Neshun Kenyetta vhu poot thees bed SEED und peuple-a ooff zee noo genereshun zeey du nut vunt tu chunge-a insteed cunteenooeting zee hetres. Um gesh dee bork, bork!Let me-a esk yuoo STEPHEN, vhu run a preseedentiel cempeeegn Fur KIBEKI in 2002 tu mufe-a oooot MOI, oobfeeoosly is REILA, vhu sent Keebeki effter beeeng ick fur treetment ebrued, ooffcuoorce-a REILA, su iff REILA ves in hoongry ooff pooer cuoold he-a teke-a thet chunce-a ooff heem beeeng a preseedent, iff he-a ves in ifeel heert leeke-a keekooyoo zeey ere-a, vuoold he-a coot teecket fur keebeki tu ebreud? Yuoo knoo ellveys GOD veell refeeel, vhee KIBEKI ceme-a beck, he-a soocked oooot REILA he-a furgutee iferytheeng guud REILA deed fur heem. Su noo, peuple-a ilected heem, boot egeeen he-a stulee zee ilecshun, Su let me-a esk yuoo stephee, iff sumeune-a cumes tu yuoor huoose-a und steell yuoor coo, zeen he-a tells yuoo cume-a let’s telk, vhet vuoold yuoo du. I du nut sooppurt vhet zeey deed becoose-a thees is leeke-a sume-a oone-a teeleeng yuoor coo zeen effter is geefing yuoo a rooles thet cume-a und shere-a thees coo tugezeer. Hurty flurty schnipp schnipp!Boot foon theeng is thet, In oorder tu keep peece-a it ves OoDM vhu hed a reeght tu speek ooff shereeng pooer oor nut becoose-a it is zeeur reeght,boot yuoo see-a ifee thuoogh vhee vestern neshuns sooggests thet deel tell me-a hoo muny teemes keebeki und hees teem reffoosed tu egree-a, sume-a teeme-a zeey sey veeet tumurroo zeey cume-a veet deefffferent idees,becoose-a zeey vunt POVER “KIBEKI und HIS TEEM” nut REILA. Su,ifee zee pueent ooff egreement reeched becoose-a ooff keekvete-a und hees teem inseested zeem tu du su,boot tu zeem selfes in zeeur heert zeey du nut leeke-a et ell.Thees peuple-a iff elveys egree-a veet peuple-a iff zeere-a zeey see-a zeere-a is beneffeet fur zeem, nut fur oozeers, zeey du nut cere-a ebuoot oozeers et ell.Su let’s veeet stephee, iff yuoo ere-a reel persun vhu ceres ebuoot hoomun beeeng leeke-a yuoo I theenk yuoo veell be-a oopee oon thees issooe-a,Let us veeet tu see-a in zee perleeement zee vey zeere-a veell be-a tuu mooch cunffleect oon emendeeng zee cunsteetooshun oon impleementing zee PM puseeshun. thees peuple-a elveys vunt tu dumeenunt in ifery theeng by zeemselfes KIKOoYOo oonly. Bork bork bork!Zeey hefe-a un IFIL heert. Um de hur de hur de hur. It ves fur REILA tu steeck oon pueent ooff NO, thees mun he-a knoos thet ve-a telked beffure-a ebuoot thees issooe-a fur zee beneffeet ooff kenyuns, boot he-a keecked me-a ooffff, und thet teeme-a ves a peeceffool seetooeshun, Noo it is peuple-a vhu hefe-a ilected me-a, fur peuple’s desure-a, let heem yuoo vestern peuple-a und ell neeeghbuoors iff yuoo reel hefe-a a lufe-a fur kenyun peuple-a yuoo shuoold tell keebeki tu step doon und me-a teke-a zee puseeshun ooff peuples desure-a, I dunut teke-a unytheeng vheech peuple-a du nut vunt me-a tu be-a, I du nut vunt tu deeseppuint peuple-a, nut me-a boot peuple-a ooff Kenya zeey hefe-a tuld heem tu step doon by useeng demucrecy nut by furce-a.Noo fur yuoo tu tell me-a ebuoot PM. thet is furce-a ecshuns. Um gesh dee bork, bork! SO I reel em su deesepuited fur thet egreement becoose-a it is nut gueeng tu vurk et ell.Peuple-a ooff KENYA vunted tu meke-a chunge-a cumpletely, By REILE’s GOFERNMENT, zeere-a vuoold be-a nu CORROoPTION et ell.THEY steell need tu stey in thet pooer in oorder tu cunteenooete-a CORROoPTION, SO nu hupe-a fur KENYENS peuple-a unless iff yuoo ere-a keekooyoo YES.ELVEY zeey vunt tu use-a peuple-a fur zeeur BENEFIT, Zeey hefe-a nu troot in zeeur meend et ell.Zeey used REILA tu cempeeegn fur KIBEKI, REILA deed,oon zee resoolts zeey deed nut knoo heem et ell, becoose-a zee gut vhet zeey needed elreedy. Bork bork bork!LIke-a beck 1950 tu 60s,Vheete-a peuple-a vunted OoDINGA TO BE a PRESIDENT, Boot OoDINGA seeed NO let KENYETTA be-a, becoose-a kenyuns vunt heem, OoN retoorn, KENYETTA letter oon hed beee coorseeng und cundemneeng OoGINGA OoDINGA leeke-a a leettle-a BOY, SO heppened thees egeeen, ve-a KENYENS, thees ves a reeght teeme-a vhe-a GOD hed bruooght tu us und ve-a hefe-a broo it. Um de hur de hur de hur. ELL neshuns in zee vulrd hefe-a seee it, ve-a shuoold nut egree-a thet puseeshun ooff PM. YOoo see-a noo, KIKOoYOo sey thet REILA is hoongry ooff pooer, zeey hefe-a geefee heem vunt he-a vunted und noo is heppy. Bork bork bork! YOOo see-a zee vey zeey cell yuoo noo. THEY hefe-a furgut thet yuoor FETHER OoDINGA, is zee oone-a vhu poot zeem in pooer, zeey hefe-a furgut thet YOOo REILA zee oone-a vhu poot KIBEKI in POVER, vhu spent yuoor muney fur heem tu get vell, thet zeey hefe-a stullee zee ILECTION. BOoT GOD IS seeeeng ell keends ooff ifeeel theeng zeey du tu zee felloo hoomun beeeng joost becoose-a ooff vhet zeey cell zeemselfes ere-a SOoPERIOR. OoNCE zeey get vhet zeey vunted frum yuoo, zeey ect yuoo es yuoo ere-a nutheeng tu zeem. GOD is GREET, GOD veell geefe-a unuzeer chunce-a.Iff zeey vuoold be-a useeng zee pooer fur zee beneffeet ooff ell peuple-a regerdless ooff zee treebelism, it vuoold be-a ookey, boot zeey use-a fur nuooreeshing zeemselfes. Um gesh dee bork, bork!GOD is GREET. IRICK I sooppurt yuoo, STEPHEN IF yuoo reel beleeefe-a oon GOD I sooggest tu yuoo tu be-a seencerly. Bork bork bork!It vuoold be-a fery ferely, iff ell peuple-a ooff KENYA ve-a vuoold cume-a tugezeer ell 43 treebes, und cundem KIBEKI fur steeleeng ILECTION. KIBEKI hefe-a eboosed zee demucrecy in KENYA, elsu hefe-a eboosed zee INTERNETIONEL LEV, is a cooser ooff thuse-a tvu MPS vhu vere-a keelled, NOV KENYA ve-a ere-a SOoBMITTING oooor respect tu a THIEF und A KILLER.Fery seemmiler vhet zeey du, a theeeff gues tu zee huoose-a steels und keells, ere-a yuoo reedy tu be-a led by a keeller egeeen is a THIEF.IF yuoo hed a chunce-a tu ceptoore-a und poot zee theeeff oooot und yuoo deed nut, vhet du yuoo ixpect noo.yuoo vunt heem tu keell yuoo, und he-a deed. Bork bork bork! he-a stulee zee ILECTION, yuoo sterted telkeeng tu heem zeen he-a keelled, noo by egreeeeng tu shere-a pooer veet heem vhet du yuoo vunt egeeen. Bork bork bork! BYEE

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4 Responses to “Help Cyndi Translate This Article Please…”

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Must be written by some semi-illiterate german. No need for translation just take your time in reading it…lol

Pardon me Clay, I thought it was Swedish! Don’t bother, it might not be that interesting anyway!

Cindy

And thanks Ebony!

It’s joost a juke-a, unyvey (It’s just a joke, anyway).

There’s a web page that “translates” any English text into something that sounds like the Swedish Chef character from the Muppet Show. Can’t really be “translated” back as it is not a real language. Try it yourself at http://www.tiffman.com/bork.cgi


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